when i write we i mean i when i write i i mean you when i write i i mean us...?

We are faced with decisions about how to live and for what everyday. Sometimes we think about it, sometimes we don't, the complacency of routine lulls us into security or acceptance. We are afraid to step into the unknown for fear of what we may lose, the trouble it may cause, the insecurity of not knowing. All of which are quite necessary to include when making a decision. But sometimes you just have to go with your gut. In between the head and the heart exists a body of ambiguity. How do you live with that ambiguity? We can resort to our head, which I often do. We can resort to our heart, which I often do. Or we can struggle to hold both. Sometimes the anxiety is too much to hold both and the pendulum swings one way or another.

I need to decide every morning how I will choose to live. Will I live for money, stuff, health, job, family, people, God, appearance, feeling, security, risk, adrenaline, joy, friends, soul, prestige, performance, music...? At least I'm asking the question.

1. Some mornings I don't decide, I sleep in late, drink too much coffee, and sit on the couch indecisively...all day. That's okay.

2. Some mornings I am decisive, self-aware, conscious, motivated, and hopeful. That's okay.

3. Sometimes we make decisions and later ask the question "what the hell was I thinking?" That's okay.

4. Sometimes the decisions we make scream "THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU!" That's okay.

Today I hope the decision I make includes #'s 1, 2, and 4.